Following three flops in a row, Broadway stage producer Willard Samson is told by wealthy divorcée Donna Davis that she will finance a show but only if she is the star. The fact she can neither sing, act nor dance does not deter Samson. His press agent, Ken Douglas, lives in a theatrical boarding house run by his friend from vaudeville, Larry Martin, where he meets Jeanie Maxwell, singing teacher and aspiring songwriter from, of course, Altoona, Pa., who has come to New York to sell her songs. Samson is not interested in her songs as much as he is her stage abilities, but he can’t get rid of Donna. Ken is also plugging for Samson to use the vaudeville acts, living at the boarding house, who can’t get work because there is no more vaudeville, despite the fact that some of the acts are examples of what killed vaudeville in the first place. The show appears to have potential, with the exception of Donna, when Ken convinces her she is the perfect “outdoorable girl” for a publicity campaign and takes her to the countryside. Samson frames them as being dangerous counterfeiters and they are arrested by the country sheriff, and Samson rushes Jeanie into the star role for the final dress rehearsal. But Donna is released from jail, returns to the show for opening night and it is a miserable flop. Jeanie returns to Altoona, Samson goes on a drunken binge and Ken tries to save the show by convincing Donna into quitting.